01/02/2003 Archived Entry: "Another year"

First day back at work, and already I'm dog-tired. I had one of those moments this morning when my alarm went off where I was jolted out of a deep sleep and for probably ten seconds I had no idea who I was, where I was, or what I was doing there. For those seconds, even the concept of up and down were strange and foreign, and I felt disoriented and out-of-body. Wiggy. Very wiggy.

There were very few cars in the parking lot at work today, which is a good thing. I'm hoping that today and tomorrow will be nice and slow, because I don't think I can stand very much at this point--I am a fragile person indeed.

This would be a good time to say how much I love Mistress, because, damn, I do. January 6 will mark the beginning of the sixty-fourth month that we've been a couple, and then--as I'm sure you're all sick of hearing!--January 11 will mark the first day that we are husband and wife. I wonder, for you married couples, how long does the "incredulous gazing" stage of marriage last? That's the stage where you just kind of stare at each other and say things like, "We're married!" or "You're my wife!" I suspect it will last a long time indeed, and that's just fine with me.

I feel as if soon, I will be a complete person, but I am not one yet.

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